I once met a beautiful charming young lady who was open enough to tell me she is single and searching and among the reasons why she told me for willing to get married soonest possible left me thinking: So people can have such funny reasons for wanting to get married?
You also are single and searching for your soul mate, or life partner (note the difference!). You feel and know that you should get married for reasons best known to yourself. You may have attained the legal age for getting married according to Kenyan constitution or the right age depending on the cultures and traditions that you adhere to.
Combinations for the reasons for getting married according to me are the determinants of whether that marriage is going to last or not. Remember: Doing something for the wrong reasons in most cases leads to heartbreaks and failure.
So why do you want to get married (or why did you get married)? Read on…
The two of you have spent a considerable amount of time together during courtship. You enjoy doing things together and are happy and content being with each other. You have a lot in common and complement each other. When you are apart you just miss to be together and you surely know that without each other, life is not the same. The two of you are just meant for each other.
That is an indication that the two of you are good for each other’s companionship and a decision to get married is inevitable.
|Golden Wedding Rings|
TWO: SOCIAL PRESSURE
You have attained a certain age or status and the society has some expectations for you, among them is to get married. Everywhere you go, everyone you meet is asking suggestive questions that indicate that you are supposed to be married. Relatives, friends as well as enemies are all asking you the same rhetoric questions: Are you married? When do you plan to marry?
Some ladies/men are also proposing marriage to you whether directly or indirectly expecting you to “decode the signal and take action!”
THREE: FINANCIAL SECURITY
Why do many ladies insist on getting married to “financially stable man?” isn’t the answer is obvious? Same case applies to men. Being with a lady in life who has what it takes to manage marital finances well means you are lucky as your financial security is ensured. But some people consider financial security for all the wrong reasons and should the money end, the marriage is terminated. Here you often find people gauging a marriage partner by her/his material possessions before considering other factors.
FOUR: SOCIAL RECOGNITION
He is a successful man with high ranking social recognition. Everyone knows and admire him. Why do you think many ladies are after getting married to him? She is a lady who commands respect and admiration in the society due to various reasons. Everyone loves her, admire her. Everyone praise her and even your mum is telling you daily what a good wife material she is. Why do you think men want to marry her so much? Aren’t the answers as obvious as noon day sunshine?
Many African societies have this major expectation for ladies and gents who are coming to age: get married and have children. Same case applies to the young people; many do wish to have a child of their own. The best way to get a child of your own is to get married, unless as a lady you make a choice of getting a child with a man and staying as a single mother.
SIX: DUTY FULFILLMENT
I will give a true illustration. I once met a young man who had graduated with a degree in theology. But for him to get an ordination as a pastor in his church, he was supposed to get married. Thus he got married for the sole reason of getting an ordination.
Here, you are not under pressure to marry of whatsoever kind. But to you it is a fulfillment of a certain obligation that has some meaning to you. The society too has many duty and obligation related reasons for getting married and all vary in accordance to traditions and religious beliefs.
SEVEN: CARNAL GRATIFICATION
You are still young and your hot blood is running wild in your veins. Flames of passion and desire are threatening to consume you. Yet you simply hate the idea of pre-marital sex which is not a proper foundation for marriage. The only way to put an end to your woes, as you assume, is to get married and have someone by your side who will be there to satisfy your sexual needs when the need be.
EIGHT: EMOTIONAL GRATIFICATION
You often feel lonely, in low mood, you feel that life has sidelined you, you need a comforter, someone close to you whom you can share your deepest secrets, your worst fears, and your best moments. You wish to get someone who understands you, probably along your mood swings, someone to hold you close to his/her heart and reassure you that no matter how the world “hates” you, you can always have a reason to smile. Why? There is that special person who is in touch with the deepest, secret most personality that no one understands except him/her.
NINE: WEIRD REASONS
Weird: strange and unusual.
As much as I am such an observant person in life, there are some things which I never seem to understand. Believe me or not, this world is full of strange things. Did it ever occur to you that someone can marry you in order to offer you a sacrifice to the devil [illuminati] in order to get rich or rather to offer your first offspring a sacrifice for whatever reason?
What other reasons do you know for people getting married? Share with us.
Before making a decision to get married, take your sweet time to try and understand as much as possible why your mate wants to marry you. A healthy combination of the reasons for getting into marriage is the determining factor of the success of that marriage. Above all, pray and leave the rest to God.
Related Article: 10 Reasons why you are SINGLE up to now
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